Wall Street on Black Friday: Open or Closed?

The Market's Open? Who Cares, It's Almost Black Friday!

So, the stock market's doing its thing this week. Up a bit, down a bit, who even knows anymore? The Dow's at 47,196, the S&P's at 6,793, and the Nasdaq's chilling at 23,163. Okay, cool. But let's be real: nobody—and I mean nobody—cares about that right now. Why? Because Thanksgiving's tomorrow, and Black Friday's looming like a goddamn retail apocalypse.

The Calm Before the Shopping Storm

Wall Street's acting like everything's normal today, November 26th, 2025. Markets open, markets close, the usual grind. But out here in the real world, people are already mapping out their Black Friday strategies. I saw a woman at the grocery store yesterday with a binder. A BINDER! Filled with ads and store layouts. Seriously?

It's all so… predictable. Every year, the same song and dance. Companies pretend they're offering these amazing, once-in-a-lifetime deals (which are probably just marked-up garbage nobody wanted in the first place), and people lose their minds. Like moths to a flickering, cheaply-made, LED-powered flame.

And don't even get me started on the "shortened session" on Friday. The market closes at 1 p.m. EDT, the bond market at 2 p.m. EDT. Oh, how generous of them! Giving everyone a few extra hours to… what? Participate in the consumer frenzy? Seems like the financial sector wants its employees out there, contributing to the economic engine fueled by discounted TVs and off-brand electronics. Are they doing this to be nice? Offcourse not.

Christmas and the Inevitable Hangover

Then there's Christmas. Markets closed on December 25th, early closing on the 24th. A brief respite from the relentless pursuit of profit. But honestly, does anyone actually enjoy the market being closed? The only people who like that are probably the ones who are taking a much-needed vacation. For the rest of us, it's just a reminder of how much money we aren't making.

Speaking of holidays, check out the NYSE list for 2026... New Year's Day, MLK Day, Washington's Birthday, Good Friday... a whole bunch of days where the suits can pretend to be patriotic or religious or whatever. For a detailed list of market holidays, you can check Is US Stock Market Open on Thanksgiving and Black Friday? Check list of Wall Street holidays - livemint.com. Me? I'll be here, watching the world burn, one discounted toaster oven at a time.

I mean, what's the point of all this financial maneuvering anyway? So some hedge fund manager can buy another yacht? So some CEO can get a bigger bonus? It all feels so disconnected from reality. Like we're all just playing a giant, rigged game. And the house always wins. Always.

A Glimmer of Hope? Nah.

Okay, okay, I'm being too cynical. Maybe. I mean, Black Friday does stimulate the economy, right? And Christmas is a time for family and giving and… ugh, I can't even finish that sentence without wanting to puke. Look, I'm not saying people shouldn't enjoy themselves. I'm just saying… maybe we should all take a step back and ask ourselves if this is really what we want. This endless cycle of buying and selling and consuming. Is this really the best we can do? I don't know the answer. And frankly, I'm not sure I want to.

Wake Me Up When It's Over

Look, the market's gonna do what the market's gonna do. Black Friday's gonna be a madhouse. Christmas will be a blur of forced smiles and unwanted gifts. And I'll be here, writing about it all, complaining the whole damn time. Because that's what I do. So, yeah, enjoy your "holiday cheer." I'll see you on the other side. Hopefully, we'll all still have some semblance of sanity left.